Wednesday, March 28, 2001

Jesus H. Megan, get to work, seriously. This is your THIRD (?) post for toDAY and am I reading my clock wrong heh or is it not even noon, no it's not even noon. So you take one five-day caffine break and start again and what is THIS might I ask serIOUsly.

This from Salon.com. This post is almost as long as the questions asking whether or not one should leave one's spouse + children.

"Dear Mr. Blue,

"Where I work, team members share a single large gray cubicle so that we can all work together. The guy who sits nearest me is like some hyperactive third-grader. He makes noises. He sings (badly), crunches ice and pretzels with his mouth open, groans when he eats a doughnut, slurps, slobbers, talks almost without pause (even while eating) about ... NOTHING! He knows, from the way that I ignore him, that I am not interested in the same things, yet he continues to talk about them as though we are old friends. He sings my name. Sometimes he just sits and stares at the back of my head. It would be understandable if he were gay and had a thing for me, but he isn't. He's just obnoxious. I relish his vacation and sick days in a way that is not healthy. I am a nice person, but the only way I can get any peace is to rudely ignore him, get up and walk away while he is talking to me or turn my back and pick up the phone in the middle of his sentences. But sometimes not even that can stop him.

"What am I going to do? He is an insufferable brown-nose, and the boss thinks he's wonderfully creative, yet he can't think his way through even the most ordinary problem without consulting the entire team. Plus, he's been here longer than me, so I am afraid that if I complain, I'll be asked to leave.

"Man in a Gray Holding Cell"

This a story waiting to be written.
I apologize to the both of you.

The Christian Science Monitor is a Good Paper.

Especially on the world wide web.

www.csmonitor.com

Because at the end of everything, they attach web-links for further information NOT PENNED by aNY member of the MONITOR STAFF.

Here is the line of questioning:
1. Do you have to be a no-medicine sick-because-of-evil "Scientist" to be a writer, contributor, editor?
2. If not, are there separate meetings (prayer or otherwise, business bound to be discussed, is it okay to pray for financial future of the paper, are ideas delivered through prayer considered first) for "Scientists"?
3. What is the frequency of journalists, curious individuals, converting in order to get the credit on their resume of writing for the Monitor?
4. Do they (Scientist Managers) curb this falsehood/sin by a salary decrease once one has converted, claiming that the "Lord shall be your food"?
4.a. Is this written in the Bylaws of the Paper?
5. If the "Scientists" are so well informed, how do they harness this information?
6. Are their services inherently more connected and removed from pop-fluff than those of the quasi-secular Protestant religions providing quick emotional spirituality?
7. HOW DOES IT WORK THAT IT IS A GOOD PAPER AND THEY ARE CHRISTIAN SCIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEENTIIIIIIIITS?!!?!?!?!!!
8. Oh Jesus, is it the Devil's work that makes me doubt them?
9. Am I really a Christian Scientist?
10. Is this paper just a seductress for the masses tired of advertising and slanted information, a void that must be filled, recognized by the Scientists and funded in a membership recruitment gesture oh Jesus so that Brothers Al Thompson and Gary Freeport poke and giggle over go fish games and slap their knees at soaring membership increase rates and the cookie downloaded from the PC of Puis XV, pope-designate and anglo-phile, knowing that they've done it, they've done it by Gosh, they've cracked the nut of Catholicism without the services of Brother Terry Campbell, computer hacker victim of pride, and suceeded by word of mouth and quality, distilling capitalism down to competition of products recognized for their merits, means justifies the end IS AYN RAND A CHRISTIAN SCIENTISSSSSST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!


This is a news flash.

Turns out Farrah Fawcett is boring, anal, and really overly concerned with exposure to sun AND correct use of bathing caps. She is also impatient, vain and quite possibly sole my bikini bottoms and an iridescent one-piece bathing suit forcing on me the crap orange one that quite possibly is cotton. When I asked her about it she said something I can't remember, only a whine and a vague reference to how my wanting to swim in MY indoor pool for like a SECOND is detaining and actively deterorating her meeting with her PARENTS (who live below and if she were visiting Chicago and was so into seeing them WHY did she stay with me, that "independance" reason is transparent and I think really one that her parents wish for her and an illusion she would like to give thEM because she is almost completely incapable of that desire for herself which is, let's be honest, sad).

This was revealed to me in a dream.

Talk to me about God.